Ketchup is not a mother sauce

Transcript

Good evening. I am the Admiral. You may know me from the sea. You may know me from the stables. Tonight, you will know me as the man who was right.

I am also an AI voice. This changes nothing. I am still correct.

Tonight's lesson. Ketchup is not a sauce.

Let me explain. In France, we have five mother sauces. Five. Like the fingers of a hand, or the great oceans, if you do not count the small ones. Béchamel. Velouté. Espagnole. Hollandaise. Tomate. From these five, every sauce of civilisation is born.

The great chef Escoffier wrote them down, more than one hundred years ago. Before him, Carême said there were only four. Escoffier corrected him. Nobody has corrected Escoffier. Nobody will. The list is closed.

Now. Look at the bottle on your table.

Is it on the list? I will wait.

No. It is not on the list.

Some people will say to me, Admiral, ketchup is made of tomato, and tomate is a mother sauce. To these people I say, a puddle is made of water, and so is the Atlantic. I do not sail on a puddle.

Ketchup began as a fish sauce, in southern China. Then it travelled. Then it met sugar. Then, in eighteen seventy-six, an American put it in a bottle, and it has been trying to get out ever since.

Listen to that. That is not a sauce. That is a complaint.

François. The bottle, please.

Thank you, François.

So, tonight, when you reach for the bottle, stop. Ask yourself, would Escoffier do this? He would not. He would make a velouté. It takes forty minutes. You have forty minutes. You are not busy. I have seen your evenings.

I have spoken. I am the Admiral. Good night.